1. |
Maria-in-Parenthesis
02:28
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2. |
Murmurations
05:12
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I’ve dealt with this before
Though it’s never been quite like this
Asleep upon yer neck
Sliding on this side of a snowdrift
Amid reet guilty bliss
Never felt like this before
Filling up a cluster of clutter in the universe
All my everything’s been coming to this
If you’re reading this, then there’s no peace
U the luv I seek
Even as we speak it thru me
I been living with the devil
Adept revelling
Couldn’t possibly
Leave him
Meet me, really or there’s no peace
I been living with the devil & the devil is depression
No peace!
I cannot stop it anymore than even if I wanted to
Which I do not
Ever
Never better
“i fukkin luv u!”
No peace!
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3. |
Epicene
04:35
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Owt I can do to get close to you
Watch a beautiful entity split into two
We are not so very different, you & I
Describe why X & Y mean the opposite
Goldilocks conditioned role play before we die
Icarus, fickle Icarus
Dirt genes thrust out of a vessel
In the name of a father/ yr daughter
All potential
Done up
Whether or not were one or the othering
A brother, a mother
Sisters before misters
While everything else makes me feel so small
Chorus
Man up/Hysterics
Engendered genetics
Insist on this big pissing contest
Born to be condemned
Masculine/feminine
What then descends into division myths
Boy/girl
Man/woman
What’s done can’t be undone
Someone, social or biological?
They’re as different from me as I want them to be
I.D: Epicene
Animus & Anima
Accept effortlessly
Maybe the fear of castration?
Just wanted a big hug, ya' big lug from my love
Watch us fluctuate
I turned to Daddy-less, who just shrugs
Chorus
Man up/Hysterics
Engendered genetics
Insist on this big pissing contest
Born to be condemned
Masculine/feminine
What then descends into division myths
Girl/boy
Woman/man
Wish I could understand me sadness irrespective of X & Ys as different from me as we want it to be
ID recedes neath the belief in hierarchy
Yesir! Epicene!
Maria-in-Parenthesis
Our relief
Don’t leave
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4. |
IN
03:33
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& every little thing I think I care about will all one day be swept into nowt
& the fact the vastness crowding seems to steal away with piteous indifference is enough to make one search for an out
In the water
Nothing matters
In the water
Nothing matters
I glimpsed contentment through flickers of eye contact
No going back
In the water
Nothing matters
Then it slowly dawns on us that nothing matters owt
Cos all we’ve got is this big long now
& after “fuck everything else” tentatively
You came to me (on a beach) & flicked away my tears to the breeze
Into the sea, where we are free
Free of any inevitability
& everything we do will be forgotten soon enough & so what?
Because in the sea, we are free
In the water, nothing matters
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5. |
This is Real
03:49
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This has to be real, surpassing the ego
There is little I feel outside of letting go of what I know
A figment of the glare
I can reach my hands into the dark
Pain receptors shoot through me like a barking dog
Free will’s a descending fog that can fuck right off
I know this must be
How can it?
It cannot not be
Spiralling gloriously
This has to be real
This is real
Looking upon my husk as it starts to disappear
Just some afterglow
Telling rust
Like I was never here
You memory is rubbish & I repeat/I repeat myself
A perfect fit, getting too real
Really virtually
Your love divided me, perfectly
(Pinch me)
The shit I cling too will kill me
If it’s not blanket reality then it’s a pretty dull fantasy but it has to be real
Nobody know the reason why I want you all the time
& whether or not I live or die
It has to be real
This is real
This has to be real, to speak of
This is happening
This is real
This has to be happening
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6. |
Chaos
05:10
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Forever lost in deep chaos & insignificance
A cascading abundance over being nothingness & chaos is ever all consuming
Revelling
Death was never any kind of punishment
There is hope to fuck nothing coming afterward
Just us bouncing round in oblivion
By chance, we happened upon each other & don’t that make it all the more beautiful?
Free in chaos
We’re gone forever
No coming back; not ever
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7. |
Apophenia
04:33
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In the morning, in the evening
I am bewildered by the tilling feelz
In the sunlight, in the moonlight
Riddled, huddled beneath a paper shield
In the daylight, in the night-time
Without meaning to reach into the dark
Finding patterns & reactions
Scenic genes concede to digital crops
I’m glad it’s you upon the riverbed
Pixel fractals flicker overhead
My habitat corroborates mischief
Reality is a living dream that I have seen
This I cannot escape
Do you hear it?
Birthing foliage sprouting up underneath these sinking heels
Bed of dead leaves rising slowly
Puncturing & it is set to swallow me
In the morning, every evening
During inexorable abundance
In the sunlight or the moonlight
Confirmation bias
What’s right is right
What I want to see
So glad it’s you’s upon the riverbed
Pixel fractals flicker in my head
All at once time is all I can see
Reality is a living dream that I have seen which I cannot escape
They fuck you up
He left it again
Guess I’ll never know why he treated me then like shit insects then proceeded to feed me with weed at fourteen
There is no God
In the face of abyss
We look out for each other
That’s all there is
I do things to myself that I’m not proud of
Couldn’t even say the words to anyone but you
Now I’m thru
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8. |
Rachel Protector
04:43
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9. |
Sonder
07:20
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(sorry)
I know you’re way smarter than me, we’re asleep
We dream a blue dot before we leave
They asleep
Talk to me now
Talk me out of it
Not til the morning comes
Face to face on the bed in a bad way
Amber streetlights illuminate yr gaze
(yr my favz)
Drawing a dot
Taking a lot
We rip it apart
Talk to me now
Laughing & howling
Time ago
Nobody knows where it goes
Nothing gets me out of my head like you
Everything were nowt & dark
That is until you showed up
Plugging lux into view
Learning about cruelty/uncertainty
In the past, bold in battle glass anathema clouds or perhaps thereabouts
Out of view
Turgid, living
Screw all the dark
Tweet: we don’t know what to do
Fixed in narcissists
Don’t do it! Do it now!
Shout it out loud!
From the rooftops!
(Soz ‘ard)
If something is nothing, then nothing is something
Our ending coming by design
Imperceptible & inexorable
Caricatures in silhouette
Still, kinda wish you could remember because it were my pre/post pivotal point
“You’re my brother or sister & I love you but if you don’t back off, I’ll lamp you”
Thumbelina, through all the dark
We’re just as lost as each other
Come on you fuckers!
Don’t do it! Do it now!
Shout it out loud from the bus stop!
(Soz ‘ard)
& if nothing is something, then something is nothing
Our endings coming
No design
Imperceptible & inexorable
Caricatures in silhouette
They are scrapping for scraps on a dead man’s back
We humans are such sad creatures
Sibling rivalry is as old as the sea
Please come back to me
Still, I kinda wish you could remember cos it were my pre/post pivotal point
Now we’re just two solipsists convinced our narratives matter
Come on, sonder
There is love
Something good
We fuck up
All that hate were a waste
There is love
Between us
Something good
So as long as we’re both here
Knowing you in bits made me see there is love
Something good
We fuck up
So whatever happens
There is love
Between us
Something good
So as long as we’re both here
Knowing you in bits made me see
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